Day 164 "I Am Two"

There is a part of myself that always lies in wait, this habitual part of me that must meditate and analyze my next move.

This quiet and introspective part of myself that not many ever get to see is only a reflection of the other side, the other half, the part of myself that stands eternally ready for a battle with no knowledge of who my enemy may be, or why this enemy even chooses to look my way at all.

With my heels dug into the ground, with clenched fists ready to strike first, and a crooked and sarcastic smile that says “do your worst, or show me your best".

Both of these respective sides share the same intent, the same desires, the same goal; both fight for happiness and purpose, both use hope as their greatest ally…both sides are of equal importance if I am to weather this storm.

Both sides share so much, but both do not agree on what is the best course of action to take. Where one will think his way out of this, the other will run unchecked into the fray with nothing but raw emotion and force.

As one side will rush in, the other will hold back and devise a strategy.

One will attack, and one will turn the other cheek.

One will become the fool, while the other will try not to.

One will throw in all his chips, while the other chooses only to watch.

In the end I am two sides,

I am controlled chaos,

I am raw emotion contained,

I am vision and blind hope,

I am two that act as one... and sometimes I am nothing at all.